Yes, this one is about dressing sexy.
Warning: all ye who would rather not read my (very tame) writing about clothing + sexuality, turn back now! Shout out to my grandma, who reads every installment of HR faithfully. This won't get explicit or anything, but the ridiculous personal brain-worm of a title does mean: Be YourSelfI'dLiketoFuck.
We don't often talk about sexiness here, because it's usually not the focus of my dressing. I dress for fun, and usually it's fun to be mildly repugnant or majorly melodramatic in my fits. But sometimes, there's nothing more fun than the feeling of "I see it, I want it, I get it," and that can be facilitated by dressing *sexy*. Being the self I would wolf whistle at if I saw them walking down the street and I were a less respectful and demure fellow!
My conception of what's sexy is obviously extremely personalized, but I wanted to share some aspects of clothes that make me feel sensually powerful. As a nonbinary person, the question of dressing sexy is complicated by my relationship with how people perceive my gender, but I have recently tried to not let my assumptions about other people's assumptions make my sartorial decisions for me. As such, this post is very much from my point of view but isn't solely for people with bodies that look like mine. We'll start with some brand suggestions, then move to specific pieces that I feel have some sort of alluring aspect, on which I'll describe my thought processes.
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There are a few brands that I always find myself returning to for pieces to wear on dates, to parties, or whenever I simply want to feel like there are eyes looking my way. First, labels I have road tested:
CROP - A Buenos Aires brand with genderless pieces in cuts and fabrics that cling and release in the most incredible ways. Think American Apparel circa 2009, but less depressingly exploitative and exclusive. On the US dollar, its prices hardly ever climb above $50 an item, but everything I've gotten at CROP has been well-made and extremely comfortable.
Comme Des Garçons - A classic choice for pieces that play with proportion and shape in a way that melds "chicness" (whatever that overcooked word means at this point) with a mild sense of body horror and a readily humorous attitude.
Prada - Primness simmering with understated sensuality.
Baserange - Cozy, lazy, dreamy fabrics and long-weekend-y cuts.
Sandy Liang - Balances a childlike exuberance and sense of romance with an undeniably adult sensibility (i.e. you won't look like an overgrown baby in these clothes).
Now, labels I have thoroughly researched but don't yet own pieces by:
Carne Bollente - An explicitly sex-positive, queer venture with pieces that run the gamut from smutty to sweet.
Jacquemus - A little too sophisticated for my usual taste, but many of its pieces exude elegant eroticism.
Dion Lee - A genderless, fetish-inspired but very wearable and not overly lingerie-like collection of pieces with garter straps, corsets, and surprisingly erogenous armpit cutouts.
Maryam Nassir Zadeh - A purveyor of many of the above brands as well as its own wares, most of which meld sophistication with sex seamlessly.
Paloma Wool - Almost uncanny in its quietude, this brand deals in pieces that range from coyly diminutive to straight-up bossy, always with a quiet power.
This shirt's demure, straight-across neckline plus its clingy jersey fabric and abbreviated torso is so many people's kryptonite. I've gotten hit on more just wearing this shirt (in brown) than all other times in my life combined.
There's something very skater-sexy about this shirt...
...and this one is like $80 cheaper.
This unisex top takes the ultimate sexiest piece of clothing, the white ribbed tank, and makes it silly and sculptural.
This simple top's vertical slit and open belly are suggestive without showing much skin. Pair with low-cut pants. You want to show stomach.
This Dilara number is the sartorial representation of the bedsheets after a torrid affair. Or an office worker sneaking out for a lunchtime quickie.
Issey's pleats are always sexy, and something about this neck shape, the way it blossoms like a vase for the flower that is one's head, is very erotic.
Another pleated option for winter months. Something about those folds just makes you want to run your fingers across them!
This is Diesel's happy place: campy, kind of trashy, kind of artsy. Very sexy.
This unassuming Collina number draws the eyes up and down the body with its attached pashmina scarf that can be twisted and knotted in a multitude of sensuous manners.
This unassuming, modest tank top I own in black is somehow the sexiest item in my wardrobe, one that I've worn on countless first dates. I am wearing it right now—it's extremely comfy. I think the short cut of the torso that allows a sliver of waist to peek out is the ticket.
This shirt kiiiind of looks like a porn set-up. One false move, and some chest will be revealed. But that's what makes it exciting!
The layered cuffs on this Sandy Liang number take it from kind of frumpy to kind of flirty.
As does the sheen of this booger-green MNZ top.
This would be great for someone who recently got top surgery and wanted to soft-launch their flat chest into the universe. It looks like barnacles encrusting the body, in a sexy way.
This is the most sensual item of clothing I've ever seen. Someone with no tits, please wear it in good health.
Another campier option, this would be great for someone with a ha-yuuge chest, in my humble opinion!
Underboob is always an unexpected maneuver.
Prada prim, but with suggestive ruching.
I guess I just find this silhouette really cute?
To be worn sans top, ideally.
With a built-in scarf thingy that you can use to tie yourself up as if harnessed.
Somehow, Dion Lee cracked the code for making armpits extremely erotic (with the added bonus of avoiding huge sweat stains)!
Turtlenecks, too! They are absolutely mad over at DL! The subtle twist in the clingy merino is just perfect.
I own and love these, and I have never liked a pair of jean shorts before in my life. They are boxy enough to tamp down dysphoria for people with curvier hips and thighs (like me) and the perfect length and shade of 100% denim.
This Klein blue is just mouth-watering. And the pleats, of course.
I don't think I have to explain the sex appeal of these.
I love the slight trompe l'oeil of these jeans that make them look like they're riding low over some boxers.
Backs of knees as erogenous zones!
So cozy, tight, and colored like a romantically misty morning on the moors.
Another delicious blue in a boxer-evoking cut.
Mermaid-out-of-water casual wear.
The DRAPE of this dress, like it's being hitched up on both sides by invisible hands, maybe Patrick Swayze in Ghost's??? Just spitballing here.
Very Gatsby-Daisy tryst-core.
Prada makes balletcore actually sexy with its concoction of the *perfect* waistline.
Frames the hips like the works of art they are!
Suggest that someone should be untying them!
Wintry answer to the much-feted Olympia wedges.
The half-hidden foot emerges into curvy, strappy glory out of this Tabi sandal. So hot.
Something about these criminally affordable MNZ slides reads as so insouciant—maybe their complete lack of complexity...
Recalls the bombachas above! Wear both at once!
Laces creeping like a vine up the leg, up, up, up...
Ok, phew, go splash your face with cold water and get back to your desk job, you perv! I'm joking. Thank you for being here and suffering my lustful language. More soon.